If you’re like most people, you don’t like saying “no.” You could be following the Golden Rule; you don’t want to be rejected yourself, so you don’t want to reject others. Or you don’t want to look bad by being unhelpful and uncaring. Problem is, sometimes you have to put your time and your business’s needs first, and say “no.” If you don’t, you’ll hurt your productivity and end up resenting the person you said “yes” to. Billionaire businessman Warren Buffet once said: “The difference between successful people and very successful people is that very successful people say ‘no’ to almost everything.” Here’s how to do that and still look good.
Don’t beat around the bush. Hemming and hawing, stalling, or leading off with weak excuses only gives the other person an opening to turn their request into a discussion. You’ll still have to say “no” after wasting everyone’s time in needless conversation.
Soften it with a positive comment. “This is an interesting offer, but it’s not right for me.” Or “Hey, this looks like quite an opportunity. Thank you, but I have to pass on it.”
Tell them the reason. “That’s a great proposal, but I just don’t have the budget (or time, or bandwidth, or other reason) to pursue it.” But if telling the reason could give them an opening for a counter request, skip it and do the following:
Be brief, but not brusque. “No, we can’t do that” is too abrupt. “Unfortunately, that’s something we can’t help you with” is much better. “Unfortunately” says you know your answer isn’t what they want to hear, but you aren’t delighted about it either.
Come back with an alternative. Propose an option if you can. This usually will be another person they could ask, ideally not a competitor.
Keep the door open. If your answer is more “not now” than “no,” let them know when you may be able to say “yes.” But don’t offer this option unless you mean it. If you don’t, it’s better to shut the door now with a “no.”
